Parent Newsletter #107

March 12, 2012

Welcome! This is a free parent newsletter offered to you by Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller.


Mission Statement

Our mission is to strengthen families and improve parent communication skills (including our own) by helping parents learn practical, usable verbal strategies for raising responsible, caring, confident children.


In This Issue

1. Quote
2. Spirit Whisperer Contemplation
3. Bumper Sticker
4. Article: Picky Eaters: The Do's and Don'ts
5. Parent Talk Tip: 10 Things to Say/Not Say to Your Child about His/Her Report Card
6. Under Construction


1. Quote:

"In God's world, there is no such thing as condemnation, only commendation."
 
anonymous


2. Spirit Whisperer Contemplation

What if you spent as much time today opening your eyes to your children's point of view as you do attempting to open their eyes to yours? Maybe both points of view would expand.


3. Bumper Sticker

Noticed on a white Toyota Camry in Alsip, IL:
 
The Loudest Animals in the Zoo
Are People


4. Article: Picky Eaters: The Do's and Don'ts

By Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller
 
Does your son gag on brussel sprouts? Does he fly into a rage if his hotdog touches his fries? Does your daughter seem to thrive on tater tots and applesauce? Meal time can be frustrating when your concern is nutrition and your child’s concern is chips and Fruit Loops. What is a caring parent to do? Begin by considering the following do's and don'ts of dealing with your picky eater.
 
Don't get involved in a power struggle. It takes two to have a power struggle. Stop pushing or pulling. Power over will not work with a three-year-old or a teen. Activate the concept of power with rather than power over by using some of the strategies which follow,
 
Do remember that a healthy relationship with your child is as important as healthy eating. If you make your son sit until he cleans his plate, you might muscle him into eating a piece of fruit. At the same time, you will be harming your relationship. Overpowering, bribing, or bullying may win compliance. It will not create mutual respect.
 
Don'’t become a short-order cook. If you're serving meatloaf and your daughter chooses not to eat it, do not offer to cook her a hotdog. People don't select food off a menu when eating at home. What is served is what is served. If your son vomits when he smells spaghetti, allow him to fix something for himself from a limited selection; for instance, a peanut butter or cheese sandwich.
 
Do create side dishes. If you know your daughter doesn't like meatloaf, create side dishes that she does enjoy. Since she will eat corn and applesauce, combine that with meatloaf for the dinner meal.
 
Do give choices to help your child feel empowered.  Offer only choices that you can live with no matter what option is selected. "We are having milk. You can choose the green cup or the red cup." "I'll be putting some peas on your plate. Do you want a lot or a little? One spoonful or two?" Giving choices results in less resistance and happier meal times.
 
Do invite children to test new foods. "We're having some avocado tonight as a new experience. Put a bit on your plate and check it out if you want." Do not insist they eat it. Offer it as a choice and let it go. Goading and nagging will invite them to dig in their heels.
 
Do teach children how to remove food they don't like from their mouths. "If you taste it and you decide it's not for you tonight, put your napkin to your mouth and quietly put the food into it. Let me show you how."
 
Do appreciate effort. "I noticed you gave your mouth an opportunity to taste guacamole. I appreciate your willingness to give it a chance." "Thank you for tasting the kidney bean. You sure are a risk taker."
 
Do keep your feelings separate from your child's behaviors. When you say to your daughter, "That makes me happy," or "I just love it when you try different foods," you're inviting her to draw the conclusion that she can control your feelings and emotions with her eating habits. That gives a toddler an inappropriate sense of power.
 
Don't take it personally. Yes, you worked for an hour or more preparing dinner. Yes, you went out of your way to purchase foods your son likes. Still, refuse to take it personally if he won't eat it. His reaction is not about you. It's about him. Let it go.
 
Do model. "I bought a vegetable I haven't tasted since I was a kid: broccoli. I'm going to take just a small bite to test it. If I like it, I can always have more" It doesn't matter if you like it or not. What matters is that you modeled taking a risk and giving it a shot.
 
Do not provide junk food. If children don't eat at mealtime, so be it. Do not, however, allow them to have unlimited use of the kitchen between meals. And snacking on junk food is definitely off-limits.
 
Do not bribe. "If you eat your vegetables, I'll take you out for ice cream later." Children learn from this that we don't eat vegetables because they're healthy. We eat vegetables so we can get ice cream.
 
Do use substitutes. If you know your daughter hates the taste, texture and smell of meat, do not insist she eat it. To be sure she gets some protein, serve it in other forms during the week. Cheese, yogurt, peanut butter, eggs, and other protein substitutes can be used instead of meat on occasion.
 
Do change the format and the texture. Vegetables often look different to a child if they are thinly sliced or cut up in a different way. Fried chicken may garner less resistance served in a wrap or stir-fried with rice, or dunked in dressing or catsup.
 
Do teach the importance of eating a variety of colors. Fruit and vegetables are words that often provoke resistance. Talk instead about eating all the colors: green, red, white, orange, even blue. If a child learns to eat all the colors, he will have a healthy and balanced diet.
 
Do remember that you, too, once had foods you preferred not to eat. Have you had any snails lately? How about raw oysters? By now you have probably learned to eat them. Or perhaps not. Regardless, your children will most likely grow into healthy adults, just as you did.
 
Relax. Create a fun family time at meals. And bring home an octopus tonight.
 
Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller are the authors of Parent Talk Essentials. They are two of the world's foremost authorities on raising responsible, caring, confident children.They publish a free Uncommon Parenting blog.To obtain more information about how they can help you or your group meet your parenting needs, visit their website today: www.uncommon-parenting.com


Parent Talk Essentials

CLICK HERE TO ORDER PARENT TALK ESSENTIALS.

5. Parent Talk Tip

10 Things to Say to Your Child about His/Her Report Card
 
"I see you went up (or down) in math. What do you attribute that to?"
 
"Did anything surprise you about your report card?"
 
"Tell me more."
 
"What is your goal for next time?"
 
"You went up in government. That study group you organized must have paid off."
 
"What are you most proud of?"
 
"Tell me what disappointed you about this."
 
"What lesson can you learn here?"
 
"Every one of your teachers said they enjoyed having you in class."
 
"What do you think Mrs. Ordonez meant by 'Outstanding (or poor) attitude'?"
 
10 Things Not to Say to Your Child about His/Her Report Card
 
"I'll give you ten dollars for every A."
 
"That's it. You're grounded."
 
"You ought to be ashamed of this."
 
"I'm proud of you."
 
"You went down in Spanish. That could make it harder second semester."
 
"You should have listened to me. I knew this was going to happen."
 
"Good job!"
 
"This doesn't make me happy."
 
"This makes me really happy."
 
"I'm glad your grandfather isn't alive to see this."


6. Under Construction

The Teacher Talk Advantage: Five Voices of Effective Teaching, to be published in three months. This important book includes extensive chapters that describe verbal skills to structure, nurture, teach, debrief, and build accountability in your classroom.
 
Watch this space for an exciting opportunity and prepublication offer. Coming soon to a school near you.


Chick Moorman

Contact Chick at:
 
1-877-360-1477 (toll-free)
www.facebook.com/chick.moorman

CLICK HERE TO VISIT CHICK'S WEBSITE.

Thomas Haller

Contact Thomas at:
 
989-686-5356
www.facebook.com/thomas.b.haller

CLICK HERE TO VISIT THOMAS' WEBSITE.

Copyright

Copyright 2012 Chick Moorman Seminars and Thomas Haller Seminars, all rights reserved. Share this with your circle.
 
 
 
________________________________________________________

Special Event
The Parent Talk System Training of Trainers
 
Isn't it time for you now to answer the call and help the parents in your community learn the verbal skills necessary to become an uncommon and successful parent? Parents want to be successful and they want this information. You could be the one to give it to them.
 
Bay Valley Resort & Conference Center
2470 Old Bridge Road
Bay City, MI 48706


Facebook/Twitter
Facebook
 
Both Thomas Haller and Chick Moorman have joined Facebook. We would both welcome an opportunity to be added to your friends list. Please send us a friend request that tells us you are a parent newsletter subscriber so we can recognize how we know you.
 
Twitter
 
Yes, we both Twitter. 
 
Thomas B. Haller is now twitting. Instead of following what I am doing throughout the day, I invite you to follow what I am thinking. To join me as I tweet my thoughts, go to www.twitter.com/tomhaller.
 
Chick Moorman is now on Twitter. To sign up for Parent Talk Tips, timely questions, short but raging rants, bursts of inspiration, and random thoughts on parenting and teaching, follow the link. Why not be the first on your block to initiate regular contact? http://twitter.com/ChickMoorman

Parent Workshops
Thomas Haller and Chick Moorman are now offering new two-hour parent programs based on their new book, Parent Talk Essentials: How to Talk to Kids about Divorce, Sex, Money, School and Being Responsible in Today's World.  
  • The 6 Best Parenting Strategies Ever
  • How to Make Your Kid Do Homework Without Having a Nervous Breakdown Yourself
  • Creating a Responsible, Caring, Conscious Child
Currently booking winter programs. Affordable sessions are available now. Do your school, church, or community a real favor. Get the ball rolling. Talk to your school PTO, church group, or community program planner. Plan one or a series of sessions for the parents of your community. Both Thomas and Chick have extremely busy schedules. Call today to ensure your place on one of their calendars.
 
Thomas Haller
989-686-5356
 
Chick Moorman
989-543-5059
e-mail ipp57@aol.com

Book of the Month
The Only Three Discipline Strategies You Will Ever Need: Essential Tools for Busy Parents - by Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller
 
Currently our best-selling parenting book.
 
A must-have for parents who believe in holding children accountable for their actions without attacking their dignity or wounding their spirit.
 
Finally, a book that delivers practical discipline techniques for busy parents . . .
 
The three practical, skill-based strategies presented in this useful book will help you:
  • Eliminate whining, back talk, and procrastination.
  • Gain cooperation without nagging or yelling.
  • Hold children accountable without wounding their spirit.
  • Communicate anger in a respectful way.
  • Design consequences that are reasonable, respectful, and related to the misbehavior.
  • Become the parent you always wanted to be.
These three amazingly simple strategies are verbal skills that will work with your children. Appropriate for tots to teens!
CLICK HERE TO ORDER.

The Uncommon Parenting Blog
Learn to parent like no other so your children can grow up to be like no other.
 
Recent posts include: 
 
Posts
 
Subscribe to the blog feed or request to receive it via e-mail on the right-hand side of the home page. http://www.uncommon-parenting.com/
 
Please join us at www.uncommon-parenting.com and become a regular reader and a responder on our new website. Sign up today on the right-hand side of the home page. And while you're there, check out some of the informational articles we have posted.

Our Charity, Healing Acres
Does this sight sadden you? This is why we started Healing Acres Equine Retirement Ranch and made it our ongoing charity project. Find out more at www.healingacres.com.

Schedule
March 12 - Manchester, NH.
Motivating the Unmotivated with Chick Moorman, 8:00 am – 4:00 pm. Contact Bureau of Education & Research (BER) at 1-800-735-3503 or www.ber.org.
 
March 13 - Hartford, CT.
Motivating the Unmotivated with Chick Moorman, 8:00 am – 4:00 pm. Contact Bureau of Education & Research (BER) at 1-800-735-3503 or www.ber.org.
 
March 14 - Long Island, NY.
Motivating the Unmotivated with Chick Moorman, 8:00 am – 4:00 pm. Contact Bureau of Education & Research (BER) at 1-800-735-3503 or www.ber.org.
 
March 15 - Pittsburgh, PA.
Motivating the Unmotivated with Chick Moorman, 8:00 am – 4:00 pm. Contact Bureau of Education & Research (BER) at 1-800-735-3503 or www.ber.org.
 
March 16 - State College, PA.
Motivating the Unmotivated with Chick Moorman, 8:00 am – 4:00 pm. Contact Bureau of Education & Research (BER) at 1-800-735-3503 or www.ber.org.
 
March 24 - Brighton, MI.
To be determined with Chick Moorman, 1:00 pm – 4:00 pm. Maple Tree Montessori. For information contact Sue Cherry at 810-599-3328 or email info@mapletreemontessori.com.
 
March 27 - Algonac, MI.
The 10 Commitments: Parenting with Purpose with Chick Moorman, 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm. St. Clair County Great Start Collaborative. For information contact Riley Alley at 810-455-4397 or email alley.riley@sccresa.org.
 
March 28 - Marysville, MI.
The 10 Commitments: Parenting with Purpose with Chick Moorman, 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm. Woodlawn Developmental Center. For information contact Riley Alley at 810-455-4397 or email alley.riley@sccresa.org.

Links
Personal Power Press • P.O. Box 547 • Merrill • MI • 48637

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