The following is a juicy article. If you are shy about the subject, please skip it. The subject of sacred sex should not be taboo because it is an expression of love - love for another, love for one’s self, and even just the love of sex.
It is a year since the consciousness shift began in December 2012. As a result many of us are naturally shifting our spiritual perspectives. It may also be a time to shift our sexual perspectives as well and perhaps even wed our sexual activities with our spiritual practices.
First let’s define what we mean by making love for the purposes of this article. When two people feel an affinity or powerful love towards each other, they want to express their love through touch. If the chemistry is right, especially in the limerence stage, a couple may have the feeling of wanting to physically merge, swallow up the partner, or be swallowed up by the partner.
Limerence was defined by psychologist Dorothy Tennov to describe the near-obsessional form of romantic love. It is the involuntary cognitive and emotional state of intense romantic desire for another person. It is experienced in the initial stages of a new relationship.
TYPES OF LOVE
The ancient Greeks identified 5 different types of love:
1. Eros – Romantic & Sexual
2. Philia - Friendship
3. Storge - Kinship
4. Agape - Divine
5. Xenia - Hospitality
The Chinese identified yet another category call Ren, which is benevolent love that focuses on duty, action and attitude. In Judaism, Chesed is a form of love described as loving-kindness. Impersonal love is a love for objects, causes, principles, or goals.
I divide love into 4 states:
1. Romantic – Sexual love for lovers, significant others, and spouses.
2. Platonic – Non-sexual love for friends and family.
3. Spiritual – Altruistic, unconditional love, loving kindness, and being in service.
4. Loveless – The absence of love.
The states of love can overlap. For example, it is possible for someone to have romantic, platonic, and spiritual love towards a significant other. In fact, I believe that experiencing all three states of love with another person would be the most powerful relationship you could achieve.
Sexual Energy is one of the most powerful energies humans can generate, reflect, and absorb. However, Sexual Energy doesn’t always have to be used for the sexual act or for the goal of orgasm. Many Eastern practices discuss the tantra of love, sex, and yoga. Many of these practices defer the moment of orgasm. Sexual energy can be diverted to be used in creativity, play, prayer, manifesting desires, and making affirmations.
Sex isn’t only about inserting Tab A into slot B. Much more is happening on the energetic level. In fact two individuals can merge energetically not even involving the merging of the physical bodies. The energetic body can be caressed, massaged, and made love to.
Think about how couples make love that do not have physical body parts that work together. The making of love takes place energetically and emotionally. For more information on how to transform your sexual life into a broader experience that includes the energy body, you may want to purchase the DVD, Path of the Sexual Shaman: Teachings on Energy, Orgasm, and Wisdom, available at http://sexualshaman.com/description.html#DPSS.
When the two energies of sexuality and spirituality are combined with one intention and one action, a tremendous amount of energy can be generated and released. The intention becomes the energetic expression and the action becomes the physical expression. This form can be used in solo sex or sex with partners. Think about releasing a wish to manifest something into the Universe with the energy of an orgasm!
In Judaism, the Shekhina is the Divine Feminine, the feminine aspects of G-d. At the beginning of the Shabbath, two candles are lit by the woman of the home, kindling great arousal in the upper world. It is a mitzvah (good deed) for a Kabbalist to make love to his wife on the Shabbath. This act of the Divine Masculine and the Divine Feminine uniting makes G-d one [whole and balanced]. As above, so below. As it is on Earth, so it is in Heaven.
If you would like to explore your sexuality in safe and sacred space, here are a few ways:
1. Participate in erotic massage exchanges
2. Learn Tantric Yoga
3. Go to Sex Therapy
4. Use a Surrogate Sex Partner
5. Hire a Sacred Intimate
A Sacred Intimate is a professional that works erotically and energetically with those seeking healing, guidance or transformation in their erotic and spiritual lives. The primary gifts a Sacred Intimate contributes are Presence and Service. They are of service by: listening deeply, doing whatever is asked (within their power), performing emotional clearing, fulfilling fantasies, countering negative self-talk with affirmations, and erotic healing. A Sacred Intimate helps others remove the stigma and shame from sex and associated body parts. The Sacred Intimate provides a safe and sacred space to heal, teach, and help others explore their sexual issues.
Some of their work may include: intentional hugs, erotic massage, role play, bondage, sacred S&M play or any other things that will meet the needs of the client while not crossing the professional and personal boundaries of the Sacred Intimate. Sacred Intimate work is about healing, reclaiming, rejoicing and celebrating beautiful erotic spirit.
A Sacred Intimate has been called by many names: Erotic Priest, Priest of Love, Sacred Prostitute, Qadishtu, Heriodule, Heteratae, Courtesan, Friends with Benefits, Healer, Sexual Shaman, Sex Worker, Sex Therapist, and Sensual Masseur.
SACRED SEX RULES
In any encounter between two people there should be consent and agreement on what the ground rules are. Too many rules will restrict your freedom of expression, but a few basic ones will protect the participants involved. An agreement on the ground rules provides a safe and sacred place have sex. Sacred Sex rules are:
1. Follow the Wicca Rede of Respect: If it harms none, do what you will.
2. Exorcise shame.
3. Go with the flow of the heart.
4. Use the mind as an erogenous zone, not as a referee or judge.
5. What happens in “intimacy” stays in “intimacy”. Keep your interaction sacred by not gossiping about it to others.
When most people think about making love, they picture manifesting that love with their physical bodies. However, there is another body to consider in the use of love expression and that is the energy body. If you would like to increase your receptiveness to energy or feel it more effectively, here are 3 exercises that may help:
1. Practice with yourself: Rub the palms of your hands together a half dozen times to awaken your hand chakras. Now hold your hands in front of you, palms facing toward each other and spread about 3’ apart. Slowly begin to move the palms toward each other. Note the subtle differences in the energy.
2. Choose a crystal and run it from your crown chakra to your base chakra. Note the feeling of energy movement in your body.
3. Practice with a partner: Have another person lie horizontally. Now do a body scan by holding your open hand, palm down, over your partner’s base chakra. Note what you feel. Try to detect the shape and condition of the chakra with your hand. Now move up to the next chakra and complete this scan for all 7 chakras
Below is as example of Shaman Sex: Making Love with the Energetic Bodies, which merges the energy body in sacred ceremony. It may or may not include merging the physical bodies. I call it Shaman Sex because shamans understand the principles of the energy body. Shaman Sex connects energy bodies and physical bodies together. Sacred Shaman Sex is not sex, lust, or getting off. It is an intentional sharing and merging of energies. It is an opportunity to take two individuals’ energies and morph them into one being or shape-shift into a 3rd energy. It is not about controlling or possessing another, it is simply an equal sharing of each other.
SACRED SHAMAN SEX: ILLUMINATING LOVE ENERGETICALLY
This is a ritual for making love energetically utilizing the energy body, chakras, and aura instead of the physical body. It is an energetic exchange and a blending of polarities to create a completely balanced whole energy system.
1. Setting This ceremony is intended to be long and could last most of a day or a night. This gives time for the energy to become fully united. Set aside a large amount of time to perform this ritual. Night time is preferable and doing it under a full moon is optimal.
Suggested settings are: A private beach or lakeside where a fire can be lit. A private home with pool or hot tub. A secluded campsite in the mountains.
1. Meditate in preparation for altered space.
2. Start appropriate music such as soft drumming/rattling.
3. Each person lights a candle to represent the flame of their soul.
4. Ground, run energy, smooth auras, open chakras and energy channels.
5. Do simultaneous Reiki on each other.
6. Anoint each other’s 3rd eye with oil.
7. Create energy cord between heart chakras.
Open Sacred Space:
1. Air Ritual: Blow Florida water over each other as purification. Smudge each other with sage and feather visualizing the feather as Hummingbird flapping his wings to bless each others’ energy body.
2. Open sacred space. Call in the Gods/Goddesses of Love.
3. Take off one piece of each others’ clothing in each direction. (Should be fully nude by the end.)
4. Fire Ritual: Light the sacred fire.
The Connecting Ceremony:
1. Water Ritual: Perform shamanic baptism by showering together, bathing together, or pouring water over each other in hot tub or pool. As you do so, bless each others sacred body.
2. Earth Ritual: Build a medicine wheel with fresh rose petals and leaves plucked from long stem roses on a soft comforter. (The wheel should be large enough for both of you to lie down in.)
3. Stand in the center of the medicine wheel. Connect through the eyes to fully feel the emotions of the soul.
4. Hold hands facing each other to close the circuit and let the energy flow through both bodies.
5. Place a hand on each others’ heart to feel the beat and then entrain the two beats to become as one. Feel each others’ breath and entrain the breathing to become as one.
6. Touch foreheads so as to place 3rd eye to 3rd eye and hold for telepathic exchange.
7. One person turns so that his/her back is to the front of the other person. This can be done in the standing or lying position. One person gently nips and bites at the back of the other’s neck visualizing Jaguar’s teeth playfully possessing the one being bitten. The chills run up and down the spine, challenging Kundalini Serpent to rise out of the sacral chakra. Then reverse roles and repeat.
8. Lie sideways to each other in the medicine wheel, head to foot. Visualize Serpent flowing into the bottoms of your feet and crawling throughout your body, then send your Serpent to your partner and take the Serpent s/he gives you, repeating the journey through the body. Allow Serpent to exit through the crown chakra.
9. Do a shamanic journey in this position. Meet each other at a prearranged spot in the underworld or designate one person to be the leader and the other the follower. See if you can meet in non-ordinary reality. Bring back a message or gift for each other.
The Grand Finale:
1. Do a full body hug, all chakras touching, all rhythms entrained. Take a comforter or blanket and wrap both of you in a cocoon. (This could be done standing or lying down.)
2. Blow your breath into the mouth of your partner and vice versa. The
Closing: 1. Optional: Create a despacho together to be burned in fire. The despacho should celebrate the joining of your two spirits with each other and gifting it to Great Spirit.
2. Fire Ritual: Read a prayer for each other previously written on paper. Then burn in the fire. Visualize Eagle swooping down to collect the prayers and fly them up, up, up to Great Spirit.
3. Feed each other sweets such as strawberries dipped in whip cream or chocolate while the fire burns down.
Optional Post Ceremony Activities:
1. Perform mutual full body massages.
2. Spoon in a soft bed for the night.
THE ATTRACTOR FACTOR
What is the attractor factor that draws us to a specific person or repels from another?
What makes one person seem more attractive than another (even when excluding the criteria of physical beauty?)
Do we resonate differently depending on who we are with or what environment we are in?
Is attraction related to mirroring?
Is attraction a function of entrainment?
Why do we immediately like or not like a person?
Are we attracted to persons with lower, equal, or higher vibrations?
What causes charisma/magnetism?
- Is it mindset?
- Is it a positive attitude?
- Is it a mood, a result of an emotional state?
- Is it love, the result of an open heart?
- Is it intent, affirmations successfully manifested?
- Is it self-confidence and self-esteem?
- Is it chemical, a reaction to pheromones?
- Is it genetics, an inherited trait?
- Is it karmic, a result of many lives lived?
- Is it destiny, being endowed with charisma to learn the specific lessons associated with it?
- Is it energy from the guides and angels that surround and protect us?
- Is it the speed by which a person's energy vibrates?
- If it is derived from a higher vibration, how does a person raise his/her vibration?
- Is it increased through energy medicine exercises?
- Is it increased through grounding and running energy?
- Is it increased through doing personal work?
If it is the interaction of energy, is it true that "like attracts like" as in the Principle of Attraction?
Or is it true that "opposites attract" like the basic principle of Physics?
The phenomenon of being attracted to certain people's energy can be labeled as charisma, magnetism, charm, personality, appeal, allure, and rapport.
Like no two snowflakes are the same, no two individuals have the same energy imprint. Therefore we can be attracted to one identical twin and not the other based on the energy imprints of each twin.
I believe attraction is usually independent of physical beauty. Therefore, we shouldn't really care so much about how we look as how we feel to others.
Wikipedia defines “charisma” as: Charisma (meaning gift, of/from/favored by God/the divine) is a trait found in individuals whose personalities are characterized by a powerful charm and magnetism (attractiveness) and markedly superior capabilities of interpersonal communication and persuasion. One who is charismatic is said to be capable of using their personal being, rather than just speech or logic alone, to influence others in a personal and direct manner, and effectively communicate an argument or concept to them. It is thus a subjective rather than an objective judgment about such persons and falls into the domain of the irrational rather than rational responses.
In the New Testament, Greek charisma occurs in the context of the free grace offered by God to believers, expressing that grace is given freely, without any merit or entitlement on the part of the recipient.
If charisma is the ability to attract, it is resident in the energy body. A magnetic energy body iw defined in many different cultures. The Tibetans define is as a rainbow body that is made of pure light. Andean shamans believe the rainbow body is created by clearing all the chakras. Each chakra energy center vibrates at its natural frequency and the 7 colors of the rainbow are radiated. The Q'ero rites activate the Luminous Energy Field and plant seeds in the chakras. After receiving the 9th Rite, a new body is created that will age, heal, and die differently.
In Sufism the energy body is called "the most sacred body" and the "supracelestial body." Taoists call it "the diamond body" and those who have attained it are called "the immortals" and "the cloudwalkers." Yogic schools and Tantrics call it "the divine body." In Kriya yoga it is called "the body of bliss." In Vedanta it is called "the superconductive body." The ancient Egyptians called it "the luminous body or being" (akh) or the karast. In Gnosticism it is called "the radiant body." In the Mithraic liturgy it is called "the perfect body." In the Hermetic Corpus, it is called "the immortal body." In the alchemical tradition, it is called "the golden body."
The physical body has a system of chemicals call pheromones. These chemical secretions can trigger a social response in members of the same species. There are alarm pheromones, food trail pheromones, sex pheromones, and many others that affect behavior or physiology.
Although I have not really found answers to my many questions about the Attractor Factor, I surmise that what causes charisma is a combination of many, many factors. The greatest determining factors of charisma are most likely:
1. What energetic level do you vibrate at? The more open and loving your heart, the higher your vibration. The more personal work you have done to come to love yourself, the higher your vibration.
2. What are your past contracts and vows with the people you meet in this lifetime. Our past is with us whether it is conscious or not. We may have past life experiences and pre-life agreements that deeply affect interactions with those we meet.
February 14th is best known as Valentine's Day, which was named after 3 early Christian martyrs named Valentine. Valentine of Rome was a priest in Rome who suffered martyrdom about 269 CE. Valentine of Terni was bishop about 197 CE and was killed during the persecution of Emperor Aurelian. The 3rd Valentine was martyred in Africa. Around 498 CE, Pope Gelasius declared February 14 St. Valentine's Day.
Valentine's Day can be traced to the pagan holiday that honored Juno, the Queen of Roman Gods and Goddesses and the Goddess of Women and Marriage. The following day, February 15, was the Fertility Festival called the Feast of Lupercalia. This feast honored the Roman Gods of Agriculture, Lupercus and Faunus, and the founders of Rome, Romulus and Remus.
In Latin the meaning of the word Cupid is desire. Cupid in Roman mythology is the son of Venus, the Goddess of Love. Anyone hit by Cupid's arrow does not die but falls in love. Cupid is synonymous with Eros in Greek mythology who is the son of Aphrodite, the Goddess of Love.
In the Middle Ages in Europe it was commonly believed that birds mating season began on February 14. This day became associated with romantic love.
The oldest surviving love poem is written in a clay tablet from the times of the Sumerians, inventors of writing, around 3500 BCE. The first valentine was written in 1415 by Charles, Duke of Orleans to his wife while he was imprisoned in the Tower of London following his capture at the Battle of Agincourt.
Valentine's Day celebrates love in all forms and is not restricted to romantic love. People exchange Valentine's Day greetings with parents, teachers, siblings, friends, or anyone special or close to them.
In the US in the latter half of the 20th century, the practice of exchanging cards was extended to all manner of gifts, including roses and chocolates. About 1 billion Valentine's Day cards are sent in US each year. Women purchase 85% of all valentines. In order of popularity, Valentine's Day cards are given to teachers, children, mothers, wives, sweethearts and pets. Parents receive 1 out of every 5 valentines.
The vast number of roses sold on Valentine's Day in the US are imported mostly from South America. Approximately 110 million roses, the majority red, are sold and delivered. 73% of people who buy flowers for Valentine's Day are men, while only 27% are women.
Richard Cadbury invented the first Valentine’s Day candy box in the late 1800s. Men buy most of the millions of boxes of candy and bouquets of flowers given on Valentine's Day.
However, February 14th isn’t just about Valentine’s Day any longer. Singles Awareness Day (SAD) is a holiday celebrated on the 14th (although some prefer the 13th or the 15th). It is an alternative to Valentine's Day for people who are single. A common greeting is "Happy SAD!"
The goal of Singles Awareness Day is to let singles have celebrations and to exchange gifts with their single friends. Suggested activities for this day are sending yourself flowers, planning parties for other singles, and to participating in singles’ events.
GODS & GODDESSES OF LOVE
Here is a list of the Gods and Goddess of Love from different cultures:
Aine - Irish Goddess of love and fertility
Angus Mac Og – Celtic God of youth, love and beauty
Aphrodite - Greek Goddess of love and beauty
Astarte - Phoenician Goddess of sexual love and fertility
Baile – Irish God rules over love magick and protection for lovers
Bast (Bastet) - Egyptian Cat Goddess of love and fertility
Benzaiten – Japanese Goddess of love
Branwen – Welsh Goddess of love and beauty
Ca-the-ña – Mojave Indian Goddess of love and promiscuity
Cian – Irish God that rules over love magick
Cred - Celtic Faery Queen Goddess of love and desire rules over love magick and searching for the perfect mate
Cupid (Amor) – Roman God of erotic love and beauty
Dogoda - Polish Spirit of the West Wind, associated with love and gentleness
Dzydzilelya - Polish Goddess of love and marriage, sexuality and fertility
Finncaev – Irish Goddess of love and beauty
Freya (Freyja) – Norse Goddess of love
Frey (Freyr) – Norse God of love
Frigg – Norse Goddess of love and fertility and patron of marriage
Erato - Muse of love poetry
Eros – Greek bringer of passion and love to humanity
Erzulie Freda Dahomey (Mater Dolorosa) - Haitian Voodoo Goddess of beauty and love
Haniel & Erato - Archangels of divine love and harmony
Hathor - Egyptian Cow Goddess of love and sexuality
Inanna – Babylonian Goddess of love and war
Ishtar - Babylonian Goddess of love
Lada – Slavic Goddess of love and beauty
Mahore - Mesopotamian God of love and birth
Mami Wata – African Goddess of beauty and love
Niamh – Irish God who rules over love magick
Nuada – Irish God of youth and love
Oshun (Ochum) – Santeria/Voodoo Goddess of love and abundance
Siebog – Slavic God of love and marriage
Siofn - Norse Goddess of love affairs and liaisons
Tlazolteteo - Aztec Goddess of love and desires
Turan - Etruscan Goddess of love and vitality
Venus – Roman Goddess of love and beauty
Xochipilli – Aztec Goddess of erotic love
Yum - Lakota God of love and pleasures
Živa (Šiva, Šiwa, Siva, Siwa, Żiwia, Sieba or Razivia) – Slavic Goddess of love & fertility
LOVE & SEXUALITY
Diane Acherman – The Natural History of Love
Skye Alexander – Sex Magic for Beginners
Jody Baron - Spiritual Lovemaking: Relax into Sex & Awaken into Life
Clifforn Bishop - Sex & Spirit
Suzanne Blackburn & Margaret Wade - Reclaiming Eros: Sacred Whores & Healers
Rufus C Camphausen - The Encyclopedia of Sacred Sexuality
Barbar Carrellas - Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the 21st Century Julius Evola – Metaphysics of Sex
Helen Fisher – Anatomy of Love
Donald Michael Kraig - Modern Sex Magick
Isa Magdalena – Full Spectrum Sex
Ayala Malach Pines - Falling in Love
AT Mann & Jane Lyle - Sacred Sexuality
Kenneth Ray Stubbs - Women of Light: The New Sacred Prostitute
Dorothy Tennor – Love and Limerance
Selena Truth – Tales of a Sacred Prostitute
Katherine Woodward Thomas – Calling in the One
Donald Tyson - Sexual Alchemy: Magical Intercourse with Spirits
Ester Schaler Buchholz - The Call of Solitude: Alonetime in a World of Attachment
Joanne Wieland-Burston - Contemporary Solitude: The Joy and Pain of Being Alone
Isabel Colegate - A Pelican in the Wilderness: Hermits, Solitaries, and Recluses
Stephanie Dowrick - Intimacy and Solitude: Balance, Closeness, and Independence
Lionel Fisher - Celebrating Time Alone: Stories of Splendid Solitude
Karen Fredette - Consider the Ravens: On Contemporary Hermit Life Annemarie S. Kidder & Eugene H. Peterson - The Power of Solitude: Discovering Your True Self in a World of Nonsense and Noise
Lauren Mackler - Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life
Anneli Rufus - Party of One: The Loners' Manifesto
Dale Salwak - Wonders of Solitude
Anthony Storr - Solitude: A Return to the Self
COPYRIGHT © 2013 DRAKE BEAR STEPHEN. EXCEPT AS ACKNOWLEDGED. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED