- Use Love and Logic to provide limits in ways that reduce the odds of unwinnable power struggles -
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Technology and Kids: Real Solutions

Each and every day our kids have opportunities to take cutting edge courses on the ins and outs of the latest technology. Visiting with their friends, they can learn what’s hot, what’s not, and how to work around most technological safeguards we put in place.
While they are taking these graduate-level courses, most of us are working long hours, paying bills, cooking, cleaning, fixing broken stuff and trying to squeeze a few more hours out of each day.   As a result, trying to keep ahead of our kids’ technological savvy is impossible for most of us. Watching them every second of the day is also unrealistic. While it’s tough for some of us to admit, we have very little direct control over whether they make good digital decisions…or bad.
Real solutions to technology issues have little to do with technology…and almost
everything to do with relationships.
When we have little or no direct control over any issue, we must rely on helping our kids become motivated to make good decisions from the inside-out rather than the outside-in. This means helping them feel so loved that they want to make good choices. This means providing limits in ways that reduce the odds of unwinnable power-struggles. This means allowing them to experience empathy and consequences when they blow it…so that the focus is on their bad decision rather than our anger. It’s all about spending time with them having fun, and showing through our example that there’s more to life than screens and cyber-drama.
Addressing the many tough questions about kids and technology requires much more than a brief article. Therefore, I’ll spend the following weeks providing a series of Insider’s Club tips addressing questions such as:
•    How to avoid un-winnable power struggles and arguments.
•    Techniques for teaching respect and responsibility.
A step-by-step plan for gaining cooperation from the most challenging kids.
How to stay sane even when nothing seems to be working.
Many more Love and Logic skills for parents and educators!
I’m sure that there will be some lively discussion on our Facebook page as a result!
For more tips to building responsibility and self-esteem in your child who can cope with making the right choices, check out Love Me Enough to Set Limits.

Thanks for reading! Our goal is to help as many families as possible. If this is a benefit, forward it to a friend.
Dr. Charles Fay
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