- Why saying, "Just try it, it's easy" isn't a good idea -
Love and Logic - Insider's Club
Parents Educators Facilitators Classes and Conferences About Us

Click to play

Has someone ever said to you, "Just try it, it's easy!" and then you found out the task they coaxed you into trying was painfully difficult? Did this leave you feeling exceptionally capable or downright stupid…and embarrassed?
 
When this happens to the average adult, it doesn't take long for them to conclude two things:
 
   This person who's trying to help me is nuts…and definitely not to be trusted!
   Why should I try if I can't even handle the easy stuff?
 
Quite frequently I overhear well-meaning parents and educators using the "Just try it, it's easy!" approach in an attempt to urge a reluctant child into trying something they're afraid of. When the child finds the task easy, all is right with the world. When they don't, they're confronted with the pain of seeing they might be so slow that they can't even do something really, really "easy"!
 
How often does this need to happen before our kids lose faith in our word? How often does this have to happen before our children lose faith in their own abilities? Are you willing to take this sort of risk with your kids?
 
Experiment with asking your child:
 
A lot of kids find this kind of challenging.
Would you try this and let me know what you think?
 
If you hear, "It's too hard. I can't do it," smile, pat them on the back and ask:
Aren't you glad that I don't believe that?
 
"Aren't you glad that I don't believe that?" represents an exceptionally powerful way of communicating to your children that they have what it takes to succeed. Delivered in question format its effectiveness becomes supercharged. Remember: Questions create thinking. Statements create resistance.
 
You may also experiment with asking another question:
 
And…aren't you glad that I'm going to love you the same
even if you have to work really hard to figure this out?
 
Thanks for reading! Our goal is to help as many families as possible. If this is a benefit, forward it to a friend.
 
Dr. Charles Fay

facebook.com
Exclusive Member Discount

25% off 3 CD set: $19.95
This week $14.96
Coupon Code 110216
 

 
See Dr. Charles Fay in
 
 
See Jim Fay in 
 
 
Graduate-level credit available
 
If we're not in your city, watch a Love and Logic
or
 

 
Plan next summer's family vacation around the 
Love and Logic
Educator & Parent
Retreat
June 2017 join us at the newly renovated
 
Graduate-level credit available
 
Facebook Twitter YouTube Pintrest Google+
For helpful tips, special promotions, and event announcements, join Love and Logic® on Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, Pinterest, Google+.
Funny Parenting Stories and Funny Stories from the Classroom: amusing audios available for your listening pleasure, compliments of Love and Logic. Visit this page to download and enjoy.
 
© 2016 Love and Logic Institute, Inc. All copyright infringement laws apply. Permission granted for forwarding and/or for a single photocopy or electronic reproduction of one email tip only. Please do not alter or modify. For more information, call the Love and Logic Institute, Inc. at 800-338-4065.
 
View as Web Page

Love and Logic Institute, Inc.  •  2207 Jackson St  •  Golden, CO 80401

https://www.loveandlogic.com

Subscribe  •  Preferences  •  Send to a Friend  •  Unsubscribe  •  Report Spam
Powered by MyNewsletterBuilder